BILL BACHMANN Lyrics


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CANDY MAN

M & M's melt in your mouth not your hands,

So all those little colored dyes, keep on

  floatin' through your glands.

Cotton candy knows it, Fanny Farmer grows it,

I swear I'll never dream of another egg cream

If I can hang that Candy Man.

Saccharin pretends, while the AMA bends,

And all the little kiddies blurt, "Hey, what's

for dessert?"

The Easter Bunny brings it, even Sammy Davis sings it,

I swear I'll never think of another soft drink

If I can hang that Candy Man.

It's linked with diabetes; God knows it's been in Wheaties,

I do believe it's in salt, and even in your cigareeetties,

Fudgsicle froze it, Double Bubble blows it,

I swear I'll never pray for a Milky Way,

I swear I'll never cruise for a Fifth Avenues,

I swear I'll never spar for an old Clark Bar,

I swear I'll never mess with a tiny little Pez,

I swear I’ll never cry for some key lime pie,

I swear I’ll never do another tiramisu,

I swear I’ll never moan for a triple scoop cone,

I swear I’ll never scream for a hit of whipped cream,

I swear I don’t want any of your Good & Plenty,

I swear I've given up Reese's Peanut Butter Cups,

I swear I'm stayin' clear of those Three Musketeers,

I swear on my maker I don’t want a Jaw Breaker,

I swear I’ll never munch on a Nestlé’s Crunch,

I swear I’ll never wish for a stick of licorice,

I swear I’ll never stop for lollypop,

I swear I’ll never fiddle with a bit of peanut brittle,

If I ever do see another piece of candy,

I'm gonna melt that Candy Man.